Archive for January, 2011

I am keeping my chin up.  I am keeping hope in my heart.  I am not giving up.  I am looking forward.  I believe in myself.  I am starting a new diet today.  Ugh!  But wait, it is the carb lovers diet, where I get to eat pasta and potatoes even potato chips!  Yum!  All of those good foods that I like!  There is even ice cream and chocolate on it.  How can it go wrong?  Turns out that there are carbs that are called starch resistant carbs, they are the ones that taste really good but our bodies don’t process them into sugar.   Potatoes and bananas top the list.  Now there is a lot more to it than that but hey I retained something as I read the book yesterday!  

The book is called “The Carb Lovers Diet” and it was written by the editors of Health Magazine, Ellen Kunes and Frances Largeman-Roth.  Now it doesn’t say to go out and gorge yourself on pasta and potato and bread, it says be smart about which ones of those you eat, and how much, but you have to have at least one starch resistant carbohydrate at every meal.  The first week is like any diet you get about 1200 calories a day to jump start your diet, because let’s face it, if we don’t see big results the first week we aren’t going to continue.  Three meals and a snack every day, I can do that for a week.  Then it is different for the next 21 days.  I have not read ahead in the book.  I will let you know how it goes this week. 

Hubby’s birthday was this weekend.  I got to see him for a few hours.  I was a very quick visit but oh so worth it.  Happy birthday I love you so very much.

Happy thoughts for a happy day!

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Twenty-five years is a long time.  That is how long ago it was when the Challenger exploded.  Navy Girl was 2 years old; we were watching it on TV.  I have always been a space geek and I was working on raising another generation of space geeks.  Challenger was an especially important lift-off because it had a civilian on board, Christa McAuliffe a teacher, and I wanted Navy Girl to see that everyday people could do something that cool. 

Navy Girl was a precocious little girl, using big words and understanding what they meant.  We got up and were watching the lift off, and when the shuttle was supposed to separate from the fuel tanks and instead came apart we sat there stunned.  And then I cried.  Navy Girl didn’t know that what she had seen was a bad thing until I started to cry. 

She went around for days afterward talking about it.  How we were watching and “it was unbelievable, it just blew up!” she repeated that phrase over and over.  I will never forget her amazement, understanding, and the tragic loss for us all. 

I think I realized that day that my dream to go into space had died along with those seven astronauts.   The tragedy of Challenger and the loss of the Columbia shuttle in 2003 set our space program back decades, and made it so the likelihood of ordinary people going into space will not occur in my time.  That makes me very sad.  Remember them all today so that some day we can all “boldly go where no one has ever gone before.”

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Oprah is doing a show about the families of the military.  It is titled “the Bravest Families in America” she is calling it a wakeup call to America about what families in the military are going through.  Please watch it.  It is important that we do not forget.

The first story is about a man who was severely injured in Iraq, he has a brain injury and is now blind.  It is about how their family just does what is needed to keep everything going. 

The second story is about a woman whose son was killed in 2005, she makes the 6 hour trip to Arlington cemetery to visit him multiple times a year.  She reads him his favorite books from his childhood.  It is heartbreaking her pain is still so palpable.

The third story is about a family whose husband is a warrant officer in the army who has had multiple deployments and how they cope. 

Please watch, it is important that we do not forget.

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Do you have goals for your life?  I mean written down on a piece of paper or a list in your computer goals.  If so when did you write them?  Were you in high school and it was an assignment?  Were you in college?  Did you do it yesterday?  How about writing them today?

I am 45 years old and I do not have my goals for my life written down.  I have a vague set of goals in my head, but nothing written down.  I think one of the things I am going to do is make a list.  In my opinion a list of goals and a bucket list are different.  A list of goals I think should be how to live your life; a bucket list should be about what you want to do.  Different but both are important.  I don’t have either, I think that today I will take the time to sit down are write at least one of those.

The thing is a bucket list is easy to write, it is everything you have ever wanted to do, like climb a mountain, which actually I have no desire to do.  But making goals . . . that I think will be much harder.  A goal like eat healthier is vague, but a goal to eat at least 6 servings of fruits and vegetables a day is more specific and probably easier to actually do.  It has a number involved and when numbers are involved we have an easier time actually attaining it. 

I was reading a blog by Gretchen Rubin about the “Rules of Life” from Tolstoy and he had some doozie goals.  His rules certainly would not have made him a very fun guy to be around.  I like Gretchen Rubin; she wrote a book called “The Happiness Project.”  I actually read most of it, and she had some very good points.  Primarily that we can choose to be happy and there are small steps we can do that will help us be happier.  Decluttering our homes, offices and lives seem to be a big part of it.  Hey that can be one of my goals!

Happy thoughts for a happy day!


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As some of you know I am working on my MBA in marketing.  I am taking classes on-line.  I started taking classes this way because I was still working at least part time for this startup company, and I really believed that as soon as we got the machines done I would be going back to work full time.  Well that didn’t happen, in fact next month it will be a year ago that I got laid off permanently.  I do not even know if the company is still in business, I know that since then a couple of other people have left.  It makes me very sad; it was a great product we were developing.  I picked marketing as my emphasis because I was the marketing analyst and I wanted to do the best job I could for this nifty new product. 

I was a young mother, I got married young, I had children young and I got divorced young.  I was working at this company and one of my friends boyfriend/fiancé worked there, they took me under their wing, were my friends when I desperately needed them and taught me more than just how to water-ski.  They taught me that I was just as smart as they were, they just had an education.  Because of hanging out with them I went to college and got my engineering degree. 

Now I have made choices that have not been good for my career but were very good for my family.  I made that choice, I am paying the consequences by having an odd job history, not enough experience, too much of the wrong types of experience, and just being too damn old.  But as I learned before, if you just keeping plugging away, if you keep getting up every time someone knocks you down, you are a success.  Someone out there needs an engineer who is working on their masters in marketing, someone out there needs someone with a different perspective, someone out there needs me.  I still have hope, you should too.

Happy thoughts for a happy day!

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i watch

I watch my dad breathe; it looks like very hard work.  I watch my dad struggle everyday to keep on, keeping on.  It looks so tiring.  It takes all of his muscles just to move his lungs enough to bring a little air into and out of his body. 

I watch my dad; his skin tone is gray.  It comes from not having much lung capacity.  When you have an illness like he does doing the littlest things is hard work.  Today he did the dishes; it took him an hour to do them.  He was very tired afterward. 

I watch my dad as he watches TV.  I don’t know if he is aware of the amount of time I spend just watching him.  I assess how he is feeling, I look to see how hard he is breathing, I listen to hear how it sounds.  I watch my dad because all too soon I won’t be able too.

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I just saw another segment on Amy Chua author of “Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother”; I still have not read the book, but am gleaning the gist of the story one news article at a time.  One thing I agree with her on is the need to be in music.  I do not agree that it has to be only the violin or the piano, my girls were all in band, I insisted that they learn to play a musical instrument.  It is one of many regrets I have, I do not have the ability to read music, I do not have the ability to play music on anything except a record player and I cannot carry a tune in a bucket. 

I also insisted my children play on team sports, the funny thing is they all picked at least one sport where they were on a team but their winning or losing was all on their own shoulders.  Navy girl played tennis and golf (in fact she was the only girl on the team), Army girl ran cross country, and Air Force girl was on the swim team.  They all also had at least one team where they were team work was required, Navy girl played volleyball, Army girl was manager of the hockey team ( I know she would have played if given the chance) and Air Force girl played soccer. 

Music and sports teach kids to excel on their own and as part of the whole.  Teamwork is an essential skill that everyone needs to know.  There are very few professions where you do not need to work with others.  I actually can’t name a single one.   Learning a musical instrument and learning to play on a team are life skills that will follow your child throughout their lives.  I didn’t want my girls to have the same regrets I have, I want them to have different ones.

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When a person has a chronic illness like COPD it is a good idea for them to have a panic button.  That way when the care giver goes home or to the gym or is sleeping upstairs if the ill person has a problem they can hit the button and get help.  It is a great thing.  Unless they accidentally hit the button at 6 am.

I am now wide awake when I would really like to be sleeping and he has gone back to bed and probably to sleep.  I have been struggling most of the night to stay asleep anyway and now have just given that up.  Unfortunately I was just going to reveal the secret passage to get to the treasure in my dream when this happened.  Now I will never know what the treasure was.  *sigh*  LOL

Did I mention how very loud the panic button is?  It has to be so that it can be heard throughout the house and so that the ill person can be heard even if they cannot yell.  I am pretty sure the neighbors could hear it and everyone has their windows shut.  It is a very good thing; I just really don’t want to be awake yet.


Happy thoughts for a happy day!

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I was going to write about procrastination today, but I think I will put that off until another day.  I just don’t feel like it today.  Actually I have been having a bit of a problem with that the last few days.   I just am not motivated.  I didn’t work out on Tuesday or Thursday because I didn’t feel like leaving the house.  I only did one load of laundry this week because I just have not been . . .  well needing any clothes.  I have no idea how Gpa is doing for clothes.   I should ask him, but I probably won’t I just don’t feel like it.

I have been procrastinating in doing my discussions for my class. I have only posted there once this week, I am required to do it at least three times a week to get full credit.  The week ends tomorrow.  So I really can’t put it off much longer.  I will have to write my answers and post them one today and one tomorrow.  I should also look at what others have written and reply, after all it is supposed to be a discussion.

I have a bad case of the shoulds, I should do this and I should do that.  The problem is none of the shoulds are something I want to do.  They are all things I have to do.  *sigh* wawawawaa

One thing I should do is be grateful for all that I have.  And I am, I am grateful for all of you dear readers who have luckily come to the end of today’s blog!

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Stinky armpits and other hygiene issues that is what this blog is about today.  If you don’t want to hear about it don’t read any further.  I am trying to go more natural and listen to what my body wants and needs.  I have only been washing my hair every other day.  My head actually feels better.  Weird I would have thought it would be all itchy and oily, in reality it is less itchy and my hair seems to be in better condition.  I still shower everyday because I like showers.  It is a good reward for a great work out.  So I get my hair wet everyday, I just don’t use shampoo everyday.  I have found on the days that I don’t use shampoo my hair dries faster.  Don’t know why, must be something to do with the shampoo and conditioner holding more water, but it looks nice and no one has dropped dead from sweaty hair smell yet.

Speaking of smell, I am trying to not use deodorant either but, peee ew!  I have stinky arm pits.  Has anyone else quit using deodorant?  How long does it take for your body to start regulating that on its own?  Or does it?  this is still in the experimental stage, if I get a job interview you can be sure I will be wear ing deodorant on those days.  Heck I might even wash my hair. . .

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